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During the most recent “Connections with Eva Longoria,” Eva Longoria welcomed bestselling author Isabel Allende, known for “The House of the Spirits,” to speak candidly on aging and what women have to look forward to in growing older.
During iHeartMedia’s My Cultura Network podcast, Longoria and Allende discuss how their marriages are better than ever, share romance and beauty advice, and admit which celebrities they still crush on. Allende also speaks to the personal experiences reflected in her latest book “Violeta”, inspired by her mother.
“People always talk about a male midlife crisis – the man that buys the Ferrari, divorces, and marries the 22-year-old. A man aging in society is viewed very differently than a woman aging – don’t you think?” Eva, 47, asked the 80-year-old author.
“We live in a culture that values only beauty, success, money, and youth. As you get away from those supposed values, you become disposable, and later you become invisible,” Allende says. “For women, it is harder than it is for men because everything in the media, the culture, art accepts the idea of an old fart with a very young chick, and the other way around seems obscene.”
Isabel, who married at 77 years old, also shared her thoughts on romance at an older age. “I am experiencing it, Eva. I got married at 77… I remember my mother, at 98, was still waiting to have romance – so who knows? In our culture, the idea that old people can fall in love and let alone have sex is just appalling, but that happens at any age. The only difference between falling in love when I was 50 or 20 and now is that now I am very aware of the passage of time, so there is a sense of urgency,” she said.
Longoria also said that jealousy is toxic. “I also think jealousy takes up such an amount of energy. I remember being so jealous, and your stomach is inside out. It’s the worst feeling – why would anybody want that feeling? I think that is [the difference] with my second marriage – no, wait, my third,” she said, referring to Jose Baston. “I found [my husband] when I was 40 – and he was 50 – it was just like, ‘Can we just enjoy this life together?’ I mean, I do yell at him for the toothbrush and things like that still.”
Allende said her book “Violeta,” has a lot of fictional romance but still is based on her experiences. “In ‘Violeta’, I lent Violeta my love experiences. Of course, fictionalized, so they were not exact at all. My foundation and loss of my daughter, displacement, financial losses – everything that I have had – I lent it to her, and I also took from my mother’s life,” she said.
Part of the fiction is also daydreaming about someone you might never have a relationship with. Allende said her ultimate celebrity crush is from Spain. “Of course, I will [fantasize about Antonio Banderas] for the rest of my days. Look, my mother was 98 years old and had erotic dreams with Antonio Banderas too – why would I not do the same? What about you – who is your fantasy?”
“Ricky Martin – ‘Livin’ La Vida Loca,’ ‘Shake Your Bon-Bon.’ The love of my life is Ricky Martin!” Eva reveals.