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Portia de Rossi opens up about past bulimia struggle: 'It's just horrible'


UPDATED FEBRUARY 7, 2019 4:50 AM EST

Portia de Rossi has always been very open about her adult strugglewith eating disorders, but in a new docuseries, the Arrested Development alum shares her body imageissues as a child. The now happy and healthy star discusses her long historywith bulimia and anorexia in an online show called It Got Better.

"I felt tremendousresponsibility when I was 12 years old and I was put on a catwalk," the42-year-old says in an exclusive clip given to Entertainment Tonight. "Mymodeling agents had told me to go on a diet. So I didn't eat for 10 days beforethen."

Portia opens up about her battle with eating disorders Photo: Getty Images

In the episode, which airsMay 13, the Scandal actress discusses how her insecurities spiraled from thatpoint forward. "I get up on this catwalk, and I'm a little kid, and I'mposing and trying to be sexy and strutting around," she recalls, "andall the other models are making fun of my bushy eyebrows."

Portia is now happily married to TV host Ellen DeGeneres Photo: Getty Images

The ridicule led theblonde beauty to binge on comfort food, creating a viscous unhealthy cycle. "Igot in the car after that event, and just opened up a bag of my favorite candyand put my whole head in it," she says. "And I think, 'S--t, whathave I done? I just undid two weeks worth of dieting.' I mean, I'm 12 years old.So then I vomit. Erase the feelings with food, erase the food by vomiting... butyou're still left with the shame."

Hoping to help others withher story, Portia reveals her emotional story adding, "It makes meemotional just thinking about that day. Ugh. It's just horrible."

Watch the emotional clip below: